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关于寒假生活的英语日记也没有地方可以去,作业又让写20篇英语日记,大家帮帮我给我找10到20篇英语日记,一定要切合实际的,叙事文.
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July 10 2006 I am planning to spend my summer holiday on sports this year.Playing basketball is always my favourite,so some of my classmates and I will form a small team and play basketball together.Sometimes we may have a match against some other teams and I do enjoy the sense when we win the game.July 14 2006 Today I found time was a cruel thing.Whatever man is,time always goes on.It won’t stay to wait for somebody.You can’t use anything to exchange time.Time is also a fair thing.Although you have a lot of money or you enjoy high reputation,time won’t leave them more.Today I found I hadn’t enough time.Although I have more than a-month holiday,but I found I had a lot of things to do.I had a lot of homework to do and I am essential to complete the homework as soon as I have time.July 24 2006 I have rested for 10 days.In these days,I felt very bored.I didn’t know to do what.Although I had a lot of things to do,I felt uncomfortable.I was ill because of the hot weather.I was tired,sleepy and had no strength.My parents are worried about my health.in fact,it didn’t matter.I was always in the room with air-conditioner and opened it in a low temperature.So when I went out,the high temperature disagreed to me.At last,I was ill.August 6 2006 It was sunny today.I was excited.I got up at a quarter to seven.I made a appointment to meet at nine o’clock.After I had my breakfast,I went to the Wanjia Market .It was hot outside.When I arrived,my friends didn’t arrive.I waited for him in front of the KFC’s door.I haven’t seen them for a year.And in a year,we didn’t come into contact with others frequently.About ten minutes left,my friends arrived one by one.After we greeted,we went to play basketball in Liwan Gymnasium.The match last for tow hours.Oh!I fill very happy today!
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你还是现在开始，一天写一篇吧，这样比较轻松，千万不要等开学前一天才写！！如果不知道写什么，就看书写读后感吧~~这是最简单的了~
我晕，跟我昨天在沪江部落里见到一个网友一样，跑去找人给他做作业，结果大家毫不吝啬把所有的唾沫全给了他，我看你还只自己来吧，没什么大不了的。
扫描下载二维码00:07:25,570或最痛苦的经历"or traumatic experience of your entire life.不必在意语法 拼写或句子结构Don't worry about grammar,spelling,or sentence structure.在日记中 我希望你能谈谈…In your writing,I want you to discuss你对这经历的最深刻的想法和感受your deepest thoughts and feelings about the experience.写什么都行You can write about anything you want.但不管你选什么But whatever you choose,都必须是对你有着深刻影响的it should be something that has affected you very deeply.最好是一些…Ideally,it should be about something你从未怎么跟别人讲过的事you have not talked about with others in detail.其实挺难的 因为敞开了心扉It is critical,however,that you let yourself go去触碰那些你内心深处的感情和思想and touch those deepest emotions and thoughts that you have.换句话说In other words,就是写下你的经历和以前的感想write about what happened and how you felt about it,以及现在对它的看法如何and how you feel about it now.最后 你可以每次都写不同的痛苦经历Finally,you can write on different traumas during each session也可以整个研究过程都写同一个经历or the same one over the entire study.每次你可以选择任何想写的痛苦经历Your choice of trauma for each session is entirely up to you."很简单的做法 很直接Simple instructions.Pretty straight-forward.如果有留心 就知道当中包含了ABC三个要素If you notice,you see the ABCs in it.它包含了"写出发生的事"So it says "write about what happened",也就是行为which is the behavior essentially.写下你的深刻感受 受到的影响以及你的情感Write about your deepest feelings- your affect,your emotions.写下你的想法并分析它And write about your thought and analyze it.这样 日记里就包含了ABC三个因素The ABCs in journaling.他做了这项研究后 最初结果出来了So when he did this study,initially the results came in- because他首先看到的是焦虑水平one of the first things he looked at was the anxiety level,因此看到结果时 他失望了so when the results came in,disappointment.他考虑要不要停止这项研究In fact,thinking of stopping the study,因为这就是他的研究所得because this is what he found.大家看这幅图 这是焦虑水平So if we have this graph,this would be anxiety level.这是时间This would be time.他有一个对照组 对照组的成员He had a control group and the control group just wrote只是写下他们想写的东西about anything that they wanted to write about.随着时间推移 焦虑水平没有改变Show no change over time.从这里开始 一条直线过来So they started here,and they essentially,straight line.而干预组 实验组的成员The intervention group,the experimental group,经过四天 写下他们最痛苦…after 4 days of writing about their most traumatic,最难过的经历后most difficult experiences.他们的起点一样 当初分组是随机分的They started at the same point.They were randomly divided.他们的焦虑水平竟呈现上升趋势And then a rise in their anxiety.每天这么写 在这四天内After each of the days and during the 4 days-他们的焦虑水平上升了rise in their levels of anxiety.到了这个位置时At this point,他考虑终止研究 因为非常失望he was thinking terminating the study- very disappointed.因为他自己觉得…Because he got from personal experience-写日记对他有帮助he knew that journaling helps him and而也有其他人说过这一观点knew other people who talk about it,who swear by journaling.四天之后 从第五天开始But then,once the 4 days are over,during the fifth,尤其是第六天 第七天之后especially starting 6th,7th and on days,奇怪的事发生了this is what starts to happen.他们的焦虑水平降低了Their anxiety levels went down.达到了原来的水平Learning that they reach the same level as before,还持续下降they continue to go down.最重要的是And the most important thing is that在原来的水平之下保持稳定they stabilized below the previous level.在原来的焦虑水平之下保持稳定They stabilized below the previous levels of anxiety,他密切留意着这些参加者when he followed these participants一段很长的时间 长达一年over a longer period of time up to a year.四次 15分钟 足足一小时4 times,15 minutes- that's total of an hour.时间很短 效果是持续的That's very little.And long lasting results.想想 我们之前也知道Think about it: this is also what we saw before.有时候 简单的干预是很有效果的Sometimes,brief interventions are extremely effective.想想我上周说过的害羞研究Think about the shyness study that I spoke about last week12次 每次12分钟 让男士们与对他们…after 12 sessions of 12 minutes with women有好感的女士们独处who were interested in them,这些害羞的异性恋男士发生了很大的变化these shy heterosexual men change radically.所以改变其实可以发生在极短的时间内So change can come in a relatively brief period of time关键是我们要知道如何干预if we know how to intervene.而日记就是其中的一种干预方式And journaling is one of these interventions.我不会要你们写这个作业Now this is not going to be one of your response paper-因为太私人了it's too personal.我觉得不该布置给你们I don't think it's appropriate to assign it,193但我强烈推荐你们试一下but I certainly do recommend that you do it.严格按照Pennebaker的指示Follow specifically Pennebaker's instructions.不会占很长时间Doesn't take that long.连续四天都做 每次15到20分钟Do it on 4 days,15 minutes,20 minutes each time,想到什么写什么just write whatever comes to mind.一段时间之后可以降低你们的焦虑感So it was reducing anxiety over time.这项研究的其他结果Other results of the study-如果你想了解更多and if you want to read much more about it,他有一本很棒的书 叫《开放》he has a wonderful book called "Opening Up".Jamie Pennebaker的《开放》"Opening Up",by Jamie Pennebaker.他们变得更健康They became healthier.一年过后 他们回去看医生的人数So over the year of the study,they visited the doctor's office,远比对照组的人少compared to a control group,far less.就是说 这项研究增强了他们的免疫系统In other words,it strengthened their immune system,不光是他们的心理免疫系统not just their psychological immune system,同时还有他们的身体免疫系统their physiological immune system.总得来说他们心情好了Generally they were in a better mood.比以前更快乐 更乐观 更积极They were happier,more jovial,more benefit finders,在他们记下最深刻伤痛后after writing about their deepest traumas.他们变得更外向 不那么压抑和忧郁了They became more outgoing,less repressed,less suppressed.为什么会这样呢 我们说过积极情感Now why is that? We talked about it often that positive emotions和痛苦情感都来自同一个输送通道and painful emotions flow through the same pipeline.如果我们抑制着某些事情 或停止一些…And if we suppress something,if we stop something,痛苦的事 我们常常会间接地which is painful,we are very often indirectly,同时无意中抑制一些积极的情感inadvertently also suppressing the positive emotions,只要他们随时敞开心胸whereas here they open up,quite literally open up让这些情绪尽情流露and allow these emotions to flow through them.那他们其实是打开了一条闭塞的通道They are essentially opening up a clogged channel-一条各种情绪…a clogged channel through which emotions,包括痛苦和积极情绪流动的通道painful as well as positive emotions normally flow.他们也能体验到更高层次的快乐And they experience higher levels of happiness.他们会更阳光 更慷慨They are more open,more generous,就像你做感恩练习时所得的结果一样as we saw also when you do the gratitude exercise.非常相似Very similar results.有趣的是 会有性别差异There were gender differences,which is interesting.男女都从中受益Now both sexes benefited from it.但男士比女士受益更多However,men benefited more than women.试想一下Think about it.为什么 仔细想想 其实不无道理Why do you think that is? It makes sense,if you think about it.受益的女士 状况大大改善Women benefited significantly got better,但男士受益更多but men benefited even more.为什么?一般来说Why? Because women have,generally speaking- again,这是千遍一律的说法this is brush stroke stereotype-但一般来说 女士敞开得更多but generally speaking,women open up more.她们和女伴们谈得更多They speak more with their girl friends.她们有密友 并对她们倾诉一切They have closer friends and they talk about issues.而在今天的文化中 男士还是比较保守Men still in our culture today are much more close因为找人倾诉有点没面子because it's not cool to open up.准许自己为人 不是一件很酷的事It's not cool to give yourself the permission to be human,尤其是有其他人在旁时especially when others are listening.因此 在生活中 女士们so women generally in their lives但尽管如此 拥有强大支持的女士But still,even women who have strong supports systems仍能从这项练习中获益still benefit from this exercise,这让我想起了另一项研究的结果which reminds me of another result of a study我几个月前提到过的 在课程开始时I mentioned months ago,the beginning of the course,提到一般来说 女人which said women generally,again these are all averages,我指通常情况but in general,或者说男人 在婚姻中比女人受益更多women- or rather men benefit more from marriage than women.类似的原因For similar reason.因为女士们原来就有支持系统Because women already have the supports system in place.而男人 通常这是他们第一次遇到一个Men,very often,for the first time they are with someone,让他们觉得能安心倾诉的人 同样who they feel comfortably enough opening up to.Again,尽管男女都在长期的恋爱关系中获益both males and females benefit from a long-term relationship,但还是男士受益比女士多but men generally tend to benefit more than women.他发现了因同一个原因而产生的性别差异…For the same reason that he found gender difference here.存在于不同文化当中Across cultures.这项研究分别在中国 日本 墨西哥和阿根廷做过This is done in China,in Japan,Mexico,Argentina,当然也包括美国 欧洲等不同文化United States of course,Europe- replicated across cultures.不同文化的人们都从该项研究受益In all cultures,people benefit from this study.还有另一项研究 用的是相反的方法Here is another study,which took the exact opposite approach.Laura King是Pennebaker的学生So Laura King was a student of Pennebaker,用相反的方法来做这项研究 她说took the exact opposite approach and said,"我们来研究一下…"let's study...(inaudible)..."看当人们…to see what happens when the individuals写下最快乐的经历时会有怎样的结果write about their most intensive positive experience.她的做法明确地根据What she did specifically was taking the instructionsAbraham Maslow关于巅峰经验的研究from Abraham Maslow's work on peak experience.以下就是做法And here are the instructions.三次 15分钟Once again,this was three times,15 minutes,连续三天 总共45分钟so 45 minutes total on three consecutive days."想出生命中最精彩的经历…"Think of the most wonderful experience或多次美好的经历 快乐 兴奋的时刻or experiences in your life,happiest moments,ecstatic moments,或坠入爱河极度欢喜的时刻moments of rapture,perhaps from being in love,或者听音乐时的欢快时刻 或突然…or from listening to music,or suddenly ‘being hit’发现一本好书或好画或突然灵感乍现"by a book or painting or from some great creative moment.选择其中一个这样的时刻Choose one such experience or moment.想象自己正经历这一时刻Try to imagine yourself at that moment,沉浸在所有与这一经历有关的…including all the feelings and emotions感受和情感中associated with the experience.尽量详细地写下这次经历Now write about the experience in as much detail as possible尽量写下感受和想法trying to include the feelings,thoughts,及当时产生的情感and emotions that were present at the time.尽量尝试重新经历那些情感Please try your best to re-experience the emotions involved."这个做法和Pennebaker的做法相反Essentially the exact opposite of Pennebaker.结果呢?完全一样Results? Identical.那些写下他们巅峰经验的人Those who wrote about their peak experiences,写下最快乐经历的人 去看医生的次数少了their best experiences,visited the doctor's office less time-就是说 这个做法增强了他们的身体免疫系统in other words,it strengthened their physiological immune system让他们体验更多快乐and experienced more happiness.不论心理还是身体上都得到同样的效果So both psychological and physiological results.现在来看 你们有些人可能会想Now when you look at this,some of you may be thinking that"那Lyubomirsky的研究呢""well,what about the Lyubomirsky study?"还记得Lyubomirsky的研究吗?Remember the Lyubomirsky study?那项研究表示 当你写下积极情感时That said when you write about positive emotions.其实你感觉更糟Actually you feel worse.而写下负面情感Whereas you write about negative emotions,都会如Pennebaker所说 感觉会好些you do feel better as Pennebaker suggested.不同之处在于Here's the difference.Laura King的做法主要是…The instructions that Laura King gave were mostly,描述和重新体验were mostly about describing and re-experiencing,重现你的经历replaying your experience.而不是分析"怎么会发生这种情况"It wasn't about analyzing "why did it happen","how did it"...而是它的发生过程 就是重现It was rather how it happen- in other words,replaying it.当做法…When the instructions-而Lyubomirsky的研究是分析这种经历and this is the Lyubomirsky study- were analyze the experience:为什么会发生 你为什么会遇上之类的why it happened,how did you get there and so on and so on.这就是为什么随着时间推移 会产生负面的效果That's why it had the negative consequences over time,但只是重现经历but just replaying the experience,只写下这次经历有多美好just writing about how wonderful it is,重新体验当时的情感re-experiencing emotionally what that was-实际上会让你受益that actually let you benefit.有趣的问题是为什么Now the interesting question is why.为什么写日记能产生如此显著的好处?Why are there such remarkable benefits to journaling?我们来理解一下这个过程 当中的原理Let's understand the process,the mechanism.现在有几件事情在这里起作用So there are a few things that are at play here.例如你带着积极情感One of the things for example with positive emotions is that在回想其中一次经历when you are replaying it,you are simply,你其实是在增强神经通路you are fortifying the neural pathways.你再次重现 想象它You replay,you imagine it again让它像重新发生一样and you make it more likely to happen again.就像你面前有条河Just like when you have a river,记得两周前的类推法吗 你面前有条河remember the analogy from two weeks ago,you have a river,流过的水越多 它就变得越宽阔and the more water go through it,then the wider it becomes,然后越来越多水流进去and then the more water is likely to go into it.这是变化的本质 自我实现That's self-reinforcing nature of change.因此So the first thing,为什么写下 尤其是痛苦情感the first reason why writing especially about painful emotions但也不只是痛苦情感but not just painful emotions,之所以有所帮助是因为紧张感the reason why it helps is because of tension.我们之前讲过Daniel Wegner的"反语处理"We talked about ironic processing- Daniel Wegner's work from here而他谈到…And what he talks about is that当我们抑制非自然现象时 通常会适得其反when we suppress unnatural phenomenon,it often intensifies.比如想像一头粉红色的大象Be it thinking about a pink elephant或抑制痛苦的情感or be it suppressing painful emotions.当我们准许自己为人And when we give ourselves the permission to be human,我们都倾向于释放感情 放开心胸we are much more likely to release it,to let go,这就是治疗产生作用的原因 就是为什么和朋友分享which is why therapy helps,which is why sharing with friends,与人倾诉以及写日记能有所帮助opening up helps,which is why journaling helps.这就是抑制或压抑的概念This is the whole idea of suppression or repression.Pennebaker所说的另一件事是关联性The second thing that Pennebaker talks about is coherence.他发现的其中一件事是…One of the things that he finds is that那些受益最大的人 他分析了这个测试the individuals who benefit most,and he analyzes the test,秘密地 他对测试进行分析confidentially of course,but he analyzes the test.从这项研究受益最多的人Individuals who benefit most from the study都使用了一些领悟性的词语或词组are once introduced a lot of insight words,or insight phrases,也就是说到了第三天 他们都开始写到meaning by the third day,they are all writing"现在我知道了"或者"我明白了""now I see that" or "I understand that""我突然明白了"或"我意识到"or "it just dawned on me that" or "I realize that".日记里提及到这些词或短语的次数最多的人Those who have many of these words or phrases in their writings就是受益最大的人are the ones who benefited the most.换句话说In other words,他们已从这经历中创造出一种关联性they've created a sense of coherence out of the experience.他们从某些事当中得到了启示They make sense out of something perhaps这些事情以前也许是毫无意义的before that was senseless.也就是说 他们围绕着他们的经历创造出故事In other words,they created a story around their experiences.这经历已不再是零散的 无关的片段It's no longer dispersed,disjointed,disconnected data.现在已经是一个连贯 完整的故事Now it is a coherent whole.It's a story.现在我可以面对它了Now I can deal with it.仔细想想 人们通常最记得的是什么?And if you think about it,what do people mostly remember?他们最记得的是故事People mostly remember stories.为什么?你能记住一个故事Why? Because you remember a story,是因为它是一个整体because it's one unit- it's a whole.如果我现在给你们100个随机的词If I give you now a collection of,you know,100 random words,00:21:22,210 --> 00:21:25,090那你得花很长时间才能记住it'll take you a very long time to commit to memory.我们都清楚 我们都做过学术评估测试I mean we all know,we all took the SATs.如果我跟你讲一个故事But if I tell you a story,你多数都会记得you are much more likely to remember it.也许不是每个词都记得 但大概意思Maybe not word for word,but certainly,the general ideas.因为我们能将它连贯起来 可以理解Because we can hold it,we can grasp it.它有关联性Because it has a sense of coherence.我能理解 能记住I can deal with it.I can handle it,而不像一些零散的 不连贯的单词as opposed to some dispersed ideas,disjointed words.而同样的道理The exact same here.我们想感受到我们的生命的关联性We want to feel that our lives have a sense of coherence让生命变得有意义that we can make sense of them.Pennebaker说"我们模糊且无可预知的世界的产物之一Pennebaker: "An artifact of our ambiguous and unpredictable world就是对不能完满成功而产生的焦虑is the anxiety of not attaining completion和无法理解对一些造成痛苦困扰的缘由and not understanding a simple cause-and-effect explanation的简单解释"for traumatic disturbances.我们自然地去寻找…Alas,we naturally search for meaning事件的意义和完满性 它让我们有了对生命的…and the
it gives us a sense of control控制以及预知能力and predictability over our lives."这再次说明了疗法能起作用的原因Again,that's why therapy helps,因为我们从经验中创造出关联性because we create coherence out of experience.这就是大屠杀造成的创伤后遗症远少于…This is why there was far less post-traumatic stress disorder越南战争造成的创伤后遗症的原因after the Holocaust after there was the Vietnam war.因为在大屠杀之后 士兵们说出了这次经历Because after the Holocaust,they spoke about these experiences.他们围绕这次经历讲出一个故事 虽然悲惨They created a story around it,a tragic one,但还是会有关联性 和越战的经历不同but still there was a sense of coherence,as opposed to Vietnam对于越战 他们只有一些零散的记忆where there was just random flashes of experiences并没有准许自己为人 也没有这样的社会环境without giving themselves permission,or without society,或其他途径让他们尽情倾诉in many ways,giving them the permission to open up来说出一个他们可以应付and to create a story out of it that they could hand,可以接受的故事they could grasp.Pennebaker的研究大部分是以一位我们The work of Pennebaker to a great extent relies on the work of第一天提过的心理学家的理论为基础的a psychologist who we mentioned on the very first day of class.那就是Aaron AntonovskyAnd that is Aaron Antonovsky.Aaron AntonovskyAaron Antonovsky我把他看作幸福心理学的奠基人之一whom I consider to be one of the fathers of positive psychology,如果你记得 就会想起"健康本源学"if you remember,came up with the notion of "salutogenesis",病理模型的替代an alternative to the pathogenic model- pathogenic model,就是那个专门讲病理学和疾病的模型the model that focuses on pathology,on sickness,on illness,Antonovsky说where what Antonovsky said is我们要关注的是健康的始源we need to focus on the origins of health.Saluto是健康 genesis是本源Saluto- genesis- origin.他的具体做法如下And what he did specifically was the following.他是个社会学家 他说So he was a sociologist and he said the following-生活是艰苦的 人们都在艰苦奋斗he said: look,life is tough.People go through hardship.无论愿意与否 我们都会遇到困难They go through difficulties- whether we like it or not,生活中 我们遇到各种困难we all in life encountered hardships.恋爱中 上学时 工作中In relationship,in school,at work- whatever,whichever domain,都有困难与挫折的存在there are hardships,there are difficulties.总有时候生活是艰苦的 大家都知道Life is hard.Period.We know that.然而 有些人…However,there are some people对困难和挫折…who are able to better deal with the hardship,处理得更好 他们…with the difficulties,who still,尽管不是没遇到这些困难despite- they don't do away these hardships-就算常遇到困难和挫折despite these hardships and difficulties他们仍能过上充实 满足且幸福的生活are still able to lead a full,fulfilling and overall,happy life不是指那种…Not the constant high-精神病患者或死人的那种永恒的快乐that's reserved for psychopaths and dead people.而是有高低起伏 但是更高层次的幸福With the same ups and downs,but at a higher level of wellbeing,或者说是一个焦虑水平比较低的生活or of a lower level of anxiety.他说我们要研究这些人And he said we need to study those.不该只研究有病的人We shouldn't just study the sick people,不管是身体健康有问题的病人whether the sick people who are physically ill-就是通常在医学中用作病理学模型的病人which is mostly the pathogenic model of medicine,还是心理方面的病人-精神分裂症病人or the people who are unwell psychologically- schizophrenia,忧郁症病人 还是心理学中研究最多的焦虑症病人depression,anxiety as psychology has mostly studied.他说我们该关注健康的人 并研究他们He said we need to look at the healthy people and study them,正是这个模型…which is exactly the model让他在80年代时调查了一些风险人群that led to asking the question in 1980s with at-risk population:"是什么使得某些人"What makes some individuals succeed在艰苦的环境中取得成功?"despite unfavorable circumstances?"就是因为他的这个问题 改变了一切It was his question that made all the difference.于是在他的研究中 他做了同样的事情So he did the same in his research找了一些人来做调查 问他们and asked about the general population:"为什么他们会健康?"Who are the people who are healthy?他们健康来自哪里?And what is the origin of that health?他们和其他人有何不同?"What distinguishes them from other people?"于是他发现了关联性的作用And he came up with the notion of the sense of coherence那些人让生活保持关联性that people have the sense of coherence about their lives.也就是说What that means is that,他说他研究并最终确定的因素有三个he said it has three components that he researched and identified第一:The first component:理解能力-我能理解世界sense of comprehensibility- I understand the world.世界对我很重要 我看得到 感觉到 理解到It makes sense to me.I see.I realize.I get it.世界 事件 困难 挫折The world and event,difficulties and hardships,生活的高低起伏对我来说是宝贵经历highs and lows make sense to me mostly.第二 管理能力Second,sense of manageability.我可以处理得了 能承受得了I can deal with it.I can handle it.我能利用各种内部和外部资源处理事情I have the internal as well as external resources to deal with it而不是孤立无援as opposed to being helpless.这是一种能效 一种自信This is a sense of efficacy,of confidence-能够处理突如其来的困难being able to deal with the hardships that arise.这就是第二个因素So that's the second component.最后一个因素是…The third and the final component如Aaron Antonovsky所说 能够产生关联性的that makes up the sense of coherence,according to Antonovsky,00:26:42,490 --> 00:26:44,240意义性is a sense of meaningfulness.困难的出现不是毫无意义的This was not in vain- this difficulty.我和伴侣意见不合不是坏事This disagreement with my partner was not for nothing,因为通过这事 我们更了解对方because we understand one another better now.我们会变得更亲密And we are even close,more intimate.我们在之间的冲突是有意义的This failure was not in vain.我已经从中学习到东西 并得到成长I have learned from it.And I have grown from it.这个错误是有原因的This mistake has reason- again,这件事的发生不一定是好的not necessarily happen for the best,但可以学习如何在事情发生后用最好的方法解决but learning how to make the best of what happens.他定义了这三个因素These three components are what he identified and replicated并被用作之后的精神健康研究来源in later research as the source of mental health.根据Pennebaker和Antonovsky的说法 关联感:To quote Pennebaker- to quote Antonovsky,a sense of coherence:是"一种整体适应性"A global orientation that expresses the external-主要包含三个方面the extent to which one has a pervasive,对生活的感受性和信心：enduring though dynamic feeling of confidence that(1)在生命中个体感受到(1) the stimuli deriving from one's internal来自内外部环境的压力and external environments in the course of living are structured,是明确 具体 可预测的(即领悟性)predictable and explicable (comprehensible,in other words);(2)个体感受到应对内外部环境压力(2)the resources are available to one to meet the demands posed所需资源是充分的by these stimuli (internal resources and external resources:可以利用的(即可控性)I can deal with it,I can manage);(3)个体感受到来自内外部环境的压力具有挑战性and (3) these demands are challenges,值得花时间和精力去应对"worthy of investment and engagement (it's meaningful)."看看这三点Look at these three.对写日记的人来说For all those who write a journal,我肯定能在你们的日记中找到这三点I bet you can identify these three in your writings.这就是日记所产生的巨大影响This is what a journal does to a great extent.当我们真的写下我们的经历When we write and when we really write about our experiences,那些艰苦的经历our difficult experiences,就必须要有关联感this is very often what comes up - have sense of coherence.我知道 我懂 这经历是很重要的I see.I understand.Make sense.我现在可以面对它 承受它I can deal with it.I can handle it.我刚找到了一种处理它的方法I have just found a path of how to do it.尽管只是将它写成日记Even if dealing with it and handling it is writing a journal,最后 它对我的人生来说 是有意义的and finally,it makes sense to me.它现在变得有意义了 尽管之前意义不大It's meaningful to me now,whereas before,it didn't as much.所以 如果你没有写日记的习惯So if you don't have a journal,you don't journal,我强烈推荐你开始写日记it is certainly something that I highly,highly recommend.我来总结一下"改变"这一课:A B C三点因素Let me summarize the whole change lecture: the A,B and C.三点是相互关联The three are interconnected.事实上 如果我们真的想有所改变In fact,if we want real change to come about,必须将这三点紧密连接起来they have to be interconnected.为什么?因为习惯就像洪水一样Why? Because habit is like a flood.如果我们只是开一个凹角或一条小缝And it's not enough if we just create a small nook是不足以养成一个新习惯or cranny trying to create a new habit.因为洪水会将它冲走Because flood would wash it away.我们需要的是结合A B和CWhat we need is the A,the B and the C.将这些变化融入我们生活中Implement these changes in our lives.它们是内部相连的 举一个例子And they are interconnected.So let me give you an example.例如那些自尊心很弱的人Let's say someone who has low self-esteem.低自尊心 C 认知Low self-esteem,the C- cognition:他们会小瞧自己they don't think highly of themselves.自我评价低Poor self evaluation.当你瞧不起自己时When you don't think highly of yourself,就会比较内向 感觉没自信you are more likely to be innervated,to feel down,更别说有动力了 也因此而产生不良影响not to be motivated,and as a result of that,that is the Affect,产生不好的情感the emotion that you experience-因此很可能会变得碌碌无为as a result of that,we are much more likely to do nothing-也就是说 B是碌碌无为in other words,the B is do nothing.通过自我认知理论Now through self-perception theory,这种行为进而影响我对碌碌无为的认知the behavior then affects my cognition on doing nothing:我处理不了事情 我逃避事情I'm not dealing.I'm not coping.I'm avoiding.这会使自尊降低And that lowers my self esteem,进而使自我评价更低 就是Ceven more my evaluation of myself,the C.这导致更低落的情感And that leads to even worse emotions等等 形成一个向下的螺旋and so on and so on and so on,in a downward spiral,直到在某些情况下 我们自我放弃了until in some cases,we reach resignation,或用Martin Seligman的话来说 就是"习得性无助"or in Martin Seligman's words,learned helplessness.现在 想想那些自尊心强的人Now think of someone who has high self-esteem,他们很有自信high level of self-confidence.我相信自己 我认为我能做好I believe in myself.I think I can do well.那样会导致高水平的激励That leads to high level of motivation.记得Marva Collins是怎么做的吗?Remember what Marva Collins does?我们讲过的关于信仰的模型The model that we talked about under belief,自我实现预言self-fulfilling prophecies-能提高个人动机和导致强烈的情感that leads to high levels of motivations,strong emotions.我充满动力I'm energized.也反过来引发更多的行动 就是B 行为And that in turn leads to more action- the B,the behaviors.因为我做得更多 我应对的就更多Because I act more,I do more,I cope more.我更多地把自己置于水平线上I put myself on the line more.那我对自己的积极评价就会更高些I'm much more likely to have more positive evaluation of myself,因此也会产生更多积极情绪等等which leads to more positive emotions and on and on and on,呈现一个上升的螺旋in an upward spiral.也就是Barbara Fredrickson所说的螺旋The spiral that Barbara Fredrickson talks about他在"拓延-建构"中谈到in the Broaden-and-build,the spiral that Bandura talks about自我能效时所提到的螺旋when he discusses self-efficacy.既然涉及到这方面 就很有必要介绍一下了When we intervene,it's important to introduce,可以的话 三点我都想说说if possible,all three.从哪里说起都可以And we can start anywhere.我举个例子 例如一个有社交恐惧症的人So let's take an example- someone with socialphobia,一个害怕社交活动 不善与人交际的人someone who is afraid to be out there,in front of people.治疗这种症状的一种方法…One way to deal with it-我们先从A说起 就是影响 也就是情感let's begin with the A,the Affect,the emotion.其中一方面是药物治疗One way to deal with it is through medication直接影响我们的情绪that goes directly to our emotions.另一方面是冥想Another way of dealing with it is meditation,558同样直接影响我们的情绪which also affects our emotions directly.有些人比较适合第一种 有的适合第二种Some people benefit more from one,or from the other-这取决于他的状况有多极端depends on how extreme the situation is.这是A 影响But that's the A,the Affect.另一种治疗方法 行为One way of dealing with it,behavior,通过所谓的认知行为疗法来进行 曝光is through what's called in cognitive behavioral therapy,exposure逐步将自己曝光在产生这种恐惧的刺激物前which is gradual exposure to stimuli that create that phobia.首先 先走出家门10码So initially I'll walk,you know,10 yards out of my home.先通过想象来曝光Initially exposure through the imagination之后付诸实践and I include it under behavior,因为我们的大脑分不清楚…because the mind does know the difference想象和现实的差异between the imaginary and the real.逐渐走出更远So gradually being exposed to it.随着时间推移 曝光度越来越高Over time being exposed more and more,直到我可以去到一个商场until I can go out to a mall并再也没有一年前那种焦虑and not experience the same anxiety that I did a year ago.这就是行为治疗法So that's through behavior.很有效 曝光的方法Very effective- the exposure technique.最后 在治疗过程中还能介入认知And finally,you can also intervene through cognition in therapy,来处理不理智的想法 心理困惑in dealing with irrational thoughts,psychological traps,那三个M "我有将事情放大吗the three M's- "Am I magnifying? The extent.我有轻视了自己的一些才能吗?Am I minimizing something?例如小瞧了自己在与人相处方面的成功For example,my successes in working with people.我有在编造事实 想象情景吗?Or am I making up? Imaginary scenarios.本可以更现实地看待的事情 我有将它灾难化吗?My catastrophizing events when I can have a more realistic view."这就是我的想法 认知So that's my thinking about it,the cognition.跟你们说说我克服某种困难的做法Let me show you a personal example of something that I dealt with你们知道 我天生就很容易焦虑So as you know,born through genes- high levels of anxiety.00:33:53,020 --> 00:33:53,740我很容易焦虑Very prone to it.容易吃惊 容易被惊吓 现在好一点了Startle very easily- still,less today,但还是会容易吃惊but still to some extent today.以前参加壁球比赛时非常紧张Used to get very nervous in squash matches.在重要比赛时常常呼吸困难Used to choke often,when I was playing important games.但我面对的事实是And that's something that in front of,要在观众面前讲话 非常紧张和焦虑speaking in front of an audience,got very nervous and anxious.我决定要…And this is something that I decided克服这种心理that I really wanted to deal with.我面临的最大困难不是其他 而是焦虑More than any other things that I was facing.The thing anxiety.那我是怎么做的呢 我先从C 认知说起So what did I do? Let me begin first with the C,Cognition.我分析了我日记中的情况What I did- I analyzed the situation in my journal.利用学校咨询机构I used the Bureau of Study Counsel.学习并研究了关于三个M的知识I learned and studied about the three M's,那三种不理智的想法the irrational thoughts-将事情扩大化 缩小化 编造情景 灾难化magnifying,minimizing,making up,catastrophizing.通过认知 我得到了很大的帮助And through cognition,it helped a lot.但那远远不够That wasn't enough.学习了C之后 我开始学习A 影响After the C,I went to the A,the Affect.00:34:53,280 --> 00:34:57,320影响是通过身体锻炼来实现的And the Affect was for me physical exercise.直到今天 早上我还跑过步You know,even today,this morning,at home,I ran.我锻炼身体是因为…I exercise because它能大大降低我们的焦虑水平it significantly lowers anyone's levels of anxiety.可以说如果我不锻炼身体 我的口才…And I can tell a significant difference in my talks一定不会像现在这么好if I don't exercise.甚至在三四周前 我儿子David身体不适So even three or four weeks ago,David,my son was unwell周二早上我要先带他去看医生and I had to take him to the doctor first thing Tuesday morning.没有时间锻炼 我那天讲课就感觉到了Didn't have time to exercise.Actually felt it in the lecture.我觉得更紧张 更焦虑 明显不一样I was more nervous,more anxious.Makes a big difference.像我们开学时讲的一样As we'll talk about,after break,锻炼的效果基本和吃抗焦虑药效果一样it literally has the same effect as taking an anti-anxiety pill.因此锻炼对我的情绪产生直接的影响So exercise was certainly there,work directly on my emotion.瑜伽 在我处理焦虑和…Yoga.Helped me tremendously降低焦虑水平上发挥了很大的作用in dealing with anxiety and lowering that level.00:35:50,500 --> 00:35:51,730这是情感上的So this was the emotional.另一样是音乐 放松的音乐The other thing,music.Relaxing music.你们知道我喜欢什么音乐 就不重复了You know my taste in music.I don't need to repeat it again.我和Tammy结婚后 就搬到了一起住So actually when Tammy and I got married,we moved in together.她简直不相信我收藏什么样的CDShe couldn't believe my collection of CDs.她说"你看起来不像这么容易焦虑的人"She said "you don't look that anxious".因为我买的CD是…Because I had,um,"世界上最放松的经典音乐""The Most Relaxing Classical Music in the World","放松音乐" "降低焦虑的音乐""Music for Relaxation","Music for Dealing with Anxiety",全是些安静的音乐 整个架子都是silent quiet music- I mean,a whole shelf of the relax...但它们的确对我有帮助 让我得到放松But they relax me! They really help me.最后是行为 我介绍一下行为And finally,behavior.Introducing behavior.通过曝光来治疗恐惧 先是做演讲So it is through exposure.Initially giving a talk.因为我想当老师Because I want to be a teacher.我先给壁球队演讲 给我的家人演讲Giving a talk to my squash team.Giving a talk to my family.反正是在那些我感觉安心的地方Places that were safe for me.给任何愿意听的人演讲Giving a talk to anyone who would listen.从开始的少数人慢慢增加听众数量Initially small groups and gradually building it up.通过想象来曝光Exposure through the imagination.再强调一次Once again,那种想象久而久之会让人变得更自信the imaginary thing and over time becoming more
confident.另一样对我极具意义的事是Another thing that for me was very significant作为大学生 在课堂上公开发言as an undergrad here- speaking up in section.我不敢公开发言I was terrified of speaking up.当我决定那样做 我肯定And when I decided to do that,I had no doubt in my mind所有人都能听到我的心跳声that everyone in section could hear my heart beat.因为它就在我脑海中Because it was in my head.然而 逐渐地And yet,gradually,我慢慢地越来越敢于发言I spoke up a little bit more and a little bit more,通过自我知觉理论and then through self-perception theory,情况变得越来越好it actually got better and better and better.这些事情我一直在坚持做And I still do all these things.我还在做瑜伽 定期做运动I still do yoga.I still do exercise regularly.我还有参加认知行为治疗I still engage in the CBT approach,the 3 M's.我一直有写日记 内容主要和上述三件事有关I keep a journal,which combines very often all three.我还会听放松音乐 很有用And I listen to relaxing music.And it works.It works.改变并不容易 非常困难 需要很多时间 然而Now change is not easy.It is hard.It takes time.However,但那并不代表 这过程本身没有乐趣that doesn't mean that the process itself cannot be enjoyable.并不是说改变了就会快乐It's not OK when I've changed then I'll be happy.这过程本身就非常值得The process itself is extremely,potentially,extremely rewarding有时很困难 但非常值得Sometimes difficult.Potentially,very rewarding.那旅程本身就跟目的地一样重要The journey as well as the destination.关于改变的另一要点是The other important thing to remember about change-这话引用自一个人的作品this is taken from the work of,她研究精神分析学really the person who took the psycho-analysis并把这门学科提升到了积极层面 Karen Horneyand transformed it into a more positive approach- Karen Horney,我之前提到过她who I mentioned before.她认为 神经症精神病What she says about neurosis不可能完全治愈is that neurosis never go away completely.她所说的神经症And when she says neurosis,是广义上的定义she means it in the most,in the broadest sense.举个例 如果我是个完美主义者So for example,if I am a perfectionist,我心里会有一些完美主义思想I'll always have some perfectionism in me.春假后 我们会谈这问题And we'll talk about it after the break.如果我有焦虑倾向 我永不会成为…If I am prone to anxiety,I'll never be,you know,达赖喇嘛 不可能 因为我永远都会焦虑the Dalai Lama,unlikely.It'll always be there.它随时可能被任何事激发And it'll always be potentially triggered by any event.她说"没关系 那很正常And she says "that's OK.That's natural.这是人之常情"我们要接受它That's human." And we need to accept it.因为如果我们不接受它Because if we don't accept it,我们就会一直感到沮丧then we'll be constantly frustrated.因为我们想完全改变Because we want to change completely,或是期待我们的伴侣完全改变or expect our partner to change completely.这非常困难 不切实际 需要时间 要循序渐进Very difficult.Unrealistic.It takes time.It's gradual.我们也需要学习 可以学习享受这过程We need to also learn.And we can learn to enjoy the process.19世纪40年代梭罗说过:"我没有看到过Henry David Thoreau,1840s: "I know of no more encouraging fact更使人振奋的事实了than the unquestionable ability of man人类无疑是有能力来有意识地提高他自己的生命的to elevate his life by a conscious endeavor.能画出某一张画It is something to be able to paint a particular picture,雕塑出某一个肖像 美化某几个对象 是很了不起的or to carve a statue,and so to make a f但更加荣耀的事是能够塑造或画出but it is far more glorious to carve and paint那种氛围与媒介来 从中能使我们发现the very atmosphere and medium through which we look,而且能使我们正当地有所为which morally we can do.能影响当代的本质的 是最高的艺术"To affect the quality of the day,that is the highest of arts."再强调一次 重要的是过程而非结果Again,it' it's not the outcome that matters more.结果会让人有短暂快乐The outcome will lead to a spike但很快就会回归到基础水平but will very quickly to go back to our base level.是进行这些活动的这个过程…It's the process of actually doing those activities,事件A B C这些过程让人更快乐the As,the Bs,and the Cs that will lead to a happier-而并非完美 并非最快乐 而是更快乐地生活not perfect,not happiest,but happier life.需要时间来雕刻出生活的雕像Over time,it takes time to carve out live statue,切掉多余的石头chipping away the excess stone,破除限制 打造美好的生活the limitations and building a beautiful life.这不仅是最高形式的艺术It is not only the highest of art,我认为这还是高级的科学it is also- I would argue,a high science.那就是心理科学And that is the science of psychology.现在我继续往下讲I want to move on now.Move on and talk about...等等 好了One second.Here we go.我想探讨一个论题I want to talk about a topic that is related to,关于整个改变…very much related to the whole change,关于整个改变过程的论题to the whole change process.那就是设定目标And that is goal setting.现在 我问你们 这里有多少人…Now,question for you: how many people here-如果你是这样的就举手put your hand up if this applies to you-你是否想变得更有效率 更少拖延do you want to become more efficient and procrastinate less?是的话 请举手If it's true for you,put your hand up.一 二 三 四 五 六…好了One,two,three,four,five,six...OK.现在举起你的手Put your hand up now如果你希望自己没那么紧张 更冷静if you want to experience less stress and be calmer,无论是不是要期末考 好whether it's during an exam period or not.OK.一 二…好One,two...OK.如果你举过一次手Now if you put your hand up for one of these questions,就该留下来you should stay.如果你两次都举手If you put up your hand for both questions,就不仅要留下来 还要打起精神来听you should not only stay,you should stay awake.因为我们接下来的两节课Because what we are going to talk about of要谈的是 目标的重要性the next two classes is the importance of goals以及目标如何帮我们处理压力and how they can help us deal with stress,如何帮我们处理拖延问题how they can help us deal with procrastination,我们如何变得更有效率 不是超级有效率how we can become more efficient- not perfectly so.两周之后By the end of the two weeks,你们不会变成上好油的机器you are not going to a well-oiled machine.你们只会变成更快乐的人You are just going to be a happier human being-思考很重要just think is a lot.因此一开始So first of all,我们会探讨目标设定 首先the topic that we'll talk about under goal setting- first,理解目标设定的理论及实践understand the theory and the practice of goal setting:它的书本意义及社会意义the Ivory tower and the Main S第二 我们怎样处理压力second,how do we deal with stress-下节课我们会探讨这个we'll talk about th最后 我想我们没时间谈这问题and finally,I don't think we have time for this,但我还是做了课件but I'm still leaving up the powerpoints there just让你们自己看 我在书里有详尽说明的so you can look at it,and I elaborate on it in the book.从物质观念到幸福观念Moving from material perception to happiness perception,基本上是关于我在我的书里which is essentially about what I talked about第七冥想:幸福革命的章节里谈到的in the last meditation of the book,The Happiness Revolution以及所发生的内部变革and the internal revolution that can take place.我知道你们在放假前没多少时间了I know you don't have time for before break,但我还是准备了相关的材料but you still have the material on it.我们就从理论和实践开始吧So let's begin with theory and practice.我现在想做的仅仅是说服你们What I want to do now is convince you,very simply,去设立目标 说服你们这是很重要的to set goals,convince you that it is important你们要在作业上写出来and yet you are going to do it for,your response papers.你们已经开始这么做You have already started doing it,但我真的想让你们明白 作为一种生活方式but I really want to convince you,as a way of life,应该不断设定目标setting goals regularly,不管是为工作或私生活whether it's in business,whether in your personal life.首先 我会试图说服你们First,I'm going to do it by convince,向你们展示关于设定目标及工作表现的研究showing you the research on setting goals其次就是目标设定与幸福的研究and performance and second,setting goals and happiness-它是如何帮助我们赚取社会财富how it contribute to our success in the conventional
currency,以及终极财富as well as in the ultimate currency.非常简单 设定目标的人一般…Quite simply,people who set goals are generally,掌控其他事都比较成功controlling for other things,more successful.为什么?Why?一个重要的原因是 因为目标能使我们专注One of the main reasons is because what goals do is they
focus us通常来说Very often,我们常四处奔波 不知道往哪个方向走we ar we are not sure where we are
going.如果我们不知道方向And if we don't know where we are going,就不可能到达目的地 而专注能让我们找到方向we are unlikely to get there.And the focus gets us directed.00:45:21,760 --> 00:45:24,140这能带来额外的资源It brings forth resources-外部和内部资源 帮助我们达成目的external and internal resources- that are necessary to get
there.Abraham Maslow说:"专注于一个任务可以…Abraham Maslow: "Being focused on a task produces
organization在个体及自然环境中提高组织效率"for efficiency both within the organism and in the
environment."目标的作用非常显著Quite remarkable how goals actually work.我们设定目标时 或向自己灌输某种思想时When we set goals,when we enter something,无论是私人的还是公开的whether it's privately but eve better- publicly,我们心中或身边都会有些什么变化things begin to happen inside us as well as around us.而且 目标对工作表现及幸福感有重大影响Also,goals contribute to performance and well-being因为目标会让我们更具适应力because they strengthen our resilience.还记得第二节课我们探讨过适应力吗?Remember the second class when we talked about resilience?那些孩子成功的其中一个要素是One of the things that extinguish those kids who were
successful,排除艰难的外部环境的影响despite difficult external circumstances,就是他们的适应性强was the fact that they were resilient,其中一个显著特征是and one of the distinguishing characteristics他们会设定目标was they set goals for themselves.他们是以未来为导向的They were future-oriented.不但思考过去 没人帮助他们学习Not only thinking about the past,being "learned helpless"-学习适应没人帮助的情况 专注于未来learning to be helpless,but focusing on the future.尼采曾写道 只要我们有目标Nietzsche once wrote that if we have a what for,一切皆有可能every how becomes possible.只要我们有目标 一切皆有可能When we have the what for,every how becomes possible.And我们更能克服困难we are much more likely to overcome difficulties and hardships,如果我们设定了目标 任务或是我们在意的事if we have a goal,a mission,something that we care about,以及我们想实现的事something that we want to attain.目标让我们更成功Goals make us more successful就跟积极信念发挥作用的原因一样for the exact same reason that positive beliefs do.有目标就代表What we are doing with goals with declaring我们相信我们会得到某样东西that we believe we are going to get something.Roger Bannister宣称Roger Bannister declared,他会打破四分钟的纪录said that he would break the 4 minute barrier.爱迪生曾说过 到日Thomas Edison said that by the 31 of December,1879,他会发明出电灯he would generate light from electricity.设定目标有助于成功Setting goals makes it more likely to come true.因为我们的思维不喜欢Because our mind does not like when the reason inconsistency内部和外部不一致between what is inside and what is outside.而希望能相一致It wants there to be match.如果我相信一个目标 对外宣告这个目标And if I believe in a goal and I declare a goal,那外部事物就会趋向于与这目标相一致the outside is likely to match that.但正如我们探讨过的 并不会完全一致Again,not 100 percent correlation as we've discussed,但一定更有可能发生but certainly making it much more likely to happen,这让我们更容易成功making us much more likely to be successful.这个背包是什么?Now what is the knapsack?想象一下 你去远足Imagine the following: you go on a road trip.你背着一个背包And you have a knapsack on your back.你遇到一道墙 一个障碍物And you reach a wall,a barrier.你会怎么做?What do you do? Well,遇到那道墙时你可以有很多应对方法there are many things that you can do when you reach that
wall.那墙又高又长And the wall is long and high.其中一种做法是"太可惜了"然后调头走One way is to say,"OK,pity" and turn around.也就是说 避开那道墙In other words,avoid that wall.另一种方法是 拿出锤子Another thing we can do is take out our sledgehammer试着把它敲碎and try to break it down.还有另一种方法是Another thing that we can do before we do any of the other
things把背包扔过墙去is take our knapsack and throw it over the wall.把背包扔过墙去Take our knapsack and simply throw it over the wall.为什么?因为必需品是发明创造的源泉Why? Because the necessity is the mother of inventions.我需要背包来继续 需要我的背包I need my knapsack to continue.I need my knapsack.我需要它 而现在它在墙的另一边 我别无选择了I want it.And now it's over the wall.I have no choice.但要越过这道墙 要么把它敲碎But to get over that wall,whether it's by breaking it down,要么找一条路绕过它 从下方或是上方whether it's by finding a way around it,under it or over it.突然间 我会想出几个办法But suddenly,I will come up with solutions这些办法都是我之前没想到的that I have not seen before and this is how it works.目标起的作用十分显著 而出于同一个原因It's remarkable- how it works- for the exact same reason834当你宣告一个目标 例如"我想买电脑"that when you declare a goal such as "I want to buy a computer".那你就会发现到处都是电脑广告Suddenly you see computer ads all around you,00:49:23,490 --> 00:49:26,020你以前从没在这些地方看过电脑广告whereas before you didn't see computer ads.或是说你想买某种车or let's say you want to buy specific car.一时间 你会发现到处是这种车Suddenly you see that specific car all around you你以前从没看过的while you didn't see it before.为什么?因为我们一起创造现实Why? Because we co-create our reality通过大胆地提出疑问through our questions to a great extent.还记得一直在车上的那些孩子吗?Remember the children on the bus were there all along,你们没看到他们 直到我设下目标but you didn't see them until I presented a goal to you让你们数出车上的孩子数量which was to count the number of children on the bus然后孩子们就变得显而易见And then suddenly it was so clear就在你眼前that it was right in front your eyes.而之前你们就当他们不存在 这就是目标所起的作用Before,they didn't exist for you.That's what a goal does.如果我宣布 我要越过这道墙If I declare that I have to get over the wall,我的问题就是"要如何越过这道墙"and my question is "how do I get over this wall".而不是去想"这是否有可能"It's not thinking about "is it possible or is it not
possible".而是想"我要怎样越过它"It's rather "how can I get over this wall".这个问题开启了无数机会This question opens up opportunities,有很多是我之前没发现的机会many of which I have not seen before.忽然间 车上的孩子就出现在我眼前Suddenly the children on the bus are right in front of me.忽然间 墙上的一个洞出现在我眼前Suddenly a hole in the wall is right in front of me.忽然间 我看到了一把之前没看到的锤子Suddenly I see a sledgehammer that I didn't see before,就在我旁边right next to me.必需品是发明创造的源泉Necessity is the mother of inventions.如果我们问对了问题 就能开启无数机会If we ask the right questions,it opens up opportunities.另一件起作用的东西是 言语的力量The other thing that's at work here is the power of the
word:言语创造世界 要有光words create worlds.Let there be light.我们在宗教中看过这典故 上帝说要有光 就有光We've seen it in religion.And there was light.言语创造世界Words create the world."约翰福音"中写道:一开始先有言语Book of John: in the beginning was the word.但不只在宗教里是如此 看看这伟大的国家But it's not just in religion.Look at this great country.美国被宣布存在 言语有其力量The United States was declared into existence.Words have
power.它们有某种意义 尤其是当言语对我们意义重大时They have meaning,especially when the words are meaningful
to us当我们宣布的目标对我们意义重大时when the goals that we declare are meaningful to us,就更有可能实现they are much more likely to come true.概念和构想之间的关联The connection between concept and conceive不仅是语源的 而且还是形而上学的is not just etymological,it is also metaphysical.这也是真实的It is also real.因为当我们宣告某事 保留某事Because when we declare something,when we save something,就更可能成真it is much more likely to become a reality.基本上 言语能在我们的脑海里塑造一幅画面What words do is essentially create an image in our minds,尤其是我们想象目标时especially when we imagine the goal.它在我们脑海中创造一幅画面 而我们并没意识到It creates an image in our mind and the mind doesn't know该想象和现实之间的差距the difference between the imaginary and the real.我们的思维想让两者统一 目标就是这样起作用And the mind wants consistency- that is what goals do.它们让我们更容易让两者统一They help us create consistency.现在我念一段摘录I want to read you an excerpt that,我在书里谈了很多相关的话题I talk about many of these things in the book so for some of
you,你们可以看看来参考一下this may be a repetition.00:52:18,170 --> 00:52:27,410但现在我要念一段Murray的话But I want to read you an excerpt from W.H.Murray,他带领苏格兰探险队前往喜玛拉雅山who led the Scottish expedition to the Himalayas,是个成功卓越的登山家one of those prominent,accomplished climbers of all time,曾登上珠穆朗玛峰climbed the Everest.他说Here's what he says,关于他的探险旅程 他写道:in his writing about the expeditions that he took:"在所有创造的过程中 都有一个基本真理"Concerning all acts of creation there is one elementary truth,对它的忽视使得无数优秀创意和计划夭折the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans:那就是一个人一旦全身心投入That the moment one definitely commits oneself,就会触动冥冥中的天意then providence moves too.很多帮助他实现目标的事All sorts of things occur to help one若非这样也不会发生that would not have otherwise occurred.这样的决定会带来一系列事件A whole stream of events issues from the decision,各种意料之外 对他有所帮助的事件raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents人和事物and meetings and material assistance这完全是他之前没有想到的which no man would have dreamed would come his way.从歌德的诗文中我有深刻体会:I have learned a deep respect for one of Goethe's couplets:'无论你能做什么或梦想什么 去做吧''Whatever you can do,or dream you can,begin it!'勇敢带来智慧 魔力和力量"Boldness has genius,magic,and power in it."它为什么会起作用 如何起作用 我们不确定 反正就有用Why it works,how it works- we are not really sure,but it works.就像是如果你说要买电脑Just like when you declare you are looking for computer,就会看到很多机会suddenly you see all these opportunities,投入也是同样的道理the same with commitments.我们投入了 很多事就会接踵而来When we commit,things begin to happen.我们开始发现外部资源We begin to identify external resources以及内部资源as well as internal resources.会发现之前没看到的东西Things that we didn't see before.因为我的问题变成了"我怎样能成功"Because my question becomes "how can I succeed".然后车上的孩子And then children on the bus或时钟的时间忽然变得清晰可见or the time on the clock suddenly become visible to us.我们有能力成功And we are able to succeed...比以前更有可能成功 言语创造世界Much more likely to succeed than before.Words create worlds.所以这与成功息息相关 书上有写So this is about success.Very well documented.你们的一些阅读材料与之相关Some of your readings are related to this.从整体上设定目标 且从其他方面实现目标的人People who set goals generally,controlling from other factors,更成功 无论是工作方面are more successful,whether it's in business,还是个人生活方面 目标至关重要whether it's in other personal lives.Goals matter.他们不仅对"硬通货"重要They don't just matter though for the "hard currency".对"终极财富"也很重要They also matter for the "ultimate currency"-也就是幸福the currency of happiness.被正确理解的目标Goals properly understood,被正确理解的目标会让人幸福goals properly understood,lead to happiness.这里我强调"被正确理解"And I emphasize "properly understood".为什么?因为我们知道实现目标Why? Because we know that attaining goals,实现目标本身the attainment of goals does not in并不会带来幸福and of itself lead to happiness.没错 得到职位我会有短暂的幸福Yes,getting tenure will lead to a spike of my well being,但很快我就会回归基础水平but very quickly I'll go back to my base level.中了彩票或是赚大钱或…Winning a lottery or making a lot of money,or getting a,升职 都会让我短暂地感到快乐or getting promoted at work will lead to a spike in my well being但不会带来长期的持续的幸福but it will not lead to long lasting happiness.我们知道那是短暂的快乐So that's temporary- we know that.因此我们知道实现目标不会带来幸福So we know that attainment of goals does not lead to happiness.那什么能带来幸福?What does lead to happiness?充分理解目标的正确作用Understanding the proper role of goals.要明白到And understanding that不是实现目标带来幸福it's not the attaining of a goal that leads to happiness,而是拥有目标让人幸福but the having of a goal that leads to happiness.两年前 我教积极心理学So two years ago,when I taught positive psychology,一个非常重要的学者出了本书a book came out by very important scholar关于幸福的书 他是达赖喇嘛的左右手in the area of happiness,who's the Dalai Lama's right hand man.他就是翻译家Ricardo MatthieuHe's translator,Ricardo Matthieu.推出一本关于幸福的好书Wonderful book on happiness came out.我们在Williams James大楼展开了一场辩论And we,in Williams James Hall 1,engaged in a debate-那是一次哈佛学生和全体教职员的全体活动was an event for Harvard students and faculty.我们参与了辩论 题为"幸福:东方与西方"And we engaged in a debate- "Happiness: East and West".我们很多意见不谋而合And we agreed on many things-你们知道 我经常冥想as you know,I meditate regularly,我当然非常认同and certainly believe佛教心理学的力量in the power of a lot of the Buddhist psychology.然而 我们对目标的意见不一致However,the one thing that we disagreed on was goals.我们意见有分歧That's the one thing we disagree.因为在佛教方面 根据很多说法Because in Buddhism,according to many of the
interpretations-不是全部 但很多说法认为not all,many of the interpretations,我们想实现的状态是身外无物the state we want to reach is a state of non-attachment.那个状态中 我们不会想要拥有身外之物A state where we will not have something external that we want,渴望的东西that we desire,也不会有现在的这个课程that we will be completely present in the here and now.我想或许那是个非常理想的状态Now I think it's a wonderful ideal perhaps,但我一直认为 那是不现实的but what I argued and what I still argue is that it's unrealistic作为人类 我不认为As human beings,I do not believe-经过30年来每天八小时的冥想maybe after 30 years of meditating for 8 hours a day, possible-我不相信我们能实现那种but I do not believe that we can reach a state身外无物的状态where we are not attached.设定目标是与外界关联的一个例子 因为And setting goals is an example of attachment.Because当我说想赢这场比赛 或我想这门课考试优秀when I say I want to win this championship or I want to get an A-或我想在银行找份工作in this course or I want to get a job in this bank,这些就是确切的目标this is a goal which means by definition让我与结果联系起来that I'm attached to the outcome.如果我没与结果联系起来 我就不会在乎 它就不重要If I wasn't attached,if I didn't care then,it wouldn't matter.我觉得这不仅对成功很重要And I think it's not only important for success,对幸福也很重要it is also important for happiness.因此我不能认同So that's where I differ to a great extent佛教的说法from some of the Buddhist interpretations他们认为身外无物是种无欲无求的状态on non-attachment of being in a desire-less state.然而我们有着相似的看法However,where we are similar in our understanding专注于当下is the focus on the present.被正确理解的目标的作用是Goals properly understood their role解放我们 让我们享受当下is to liberate us to enjoy the present.这意味着什么?例如你去远足What does this mean? Let's say you go off on a road trip.你不知道自己要去哪And you have no idea where you are going.你没目标 心中没有方向You don't have a goal.You don't have a destination in mind.你就不大可能You are less likely rather than more likely,不大可能享受旅程less likely to enjoy the journey.因为每分钟你都在左顾右盼Because every minute you'll look left or right or ahead不知道是否错过什么to see if you are not fa如果你知道要去哪whereas if you know where you are going,你有方向感you have a sense of direction.你就被解放了You are liberated.你就更可能享受旅程You are much more likely to enjoy the process,才可以欣赏到路边的鲜花the flower on the side as well.想想你们的生活 有些时期里不知道何去何从Think about your lives- periods that you have no idea,对你们很多人来说 此刻就是这样or for many of you,I know,it's happening right now.你不知道明年会去哪You have no idea where you are going next year.目前对大多数人来说 还是没关系Now for a while,for most people,it's OK.It's fine.但一阵子后 你想知道要去哪里But after a while,you want to know where you are going.因为当你专注于某事Because when you are immersed in something,你就会有更清晰的方向感you have a clearer sense of direction.你更容易开心You are much more likely to be happy,这就能解释 为什么很多人退休后which explains why so many people,when they retire,变得不大开心become less happy,尽管他们多年来一直期待着退休even though they've been dreaming of being retired for many years到他们真的退休后 就变得闷闷不乐When they actually retire,they become less happy.那些退休后更开心的人The ones who are happier when they retire are the ones为自己设定了目标who actually set goals for themselves,或是上一门课 或是学新知识whether it's taking a class,whether it's learning something new,或是和亲人朋友相处更久whether it's spending more time with family and friends,他们都有一个目标but they have a goal,而不是"让我们享受生活吧 顺其自然"as opposed to "let's
let's just be".我们需要目标 结果 未来的导向We need that goal- this outcome,this future orientation,那样我们就能更享受此刻so that we can enjoy the present more.目标让我们得到解放 才能享受当下The goals liberate us to enjoy the here and now.换言之In other words,00:59:56,160 --> 01:00:01,如果你仔细想想 目标是一种手段if you think about it,the role of goals is actually means.它们是达到结果的一种手段They are means toward an end,结果就是当下的体验and the end are the present experiences.再次强调 目标本身Again,the goals in themselves,如我们所说的 并不能让我们感到更幸福as we said,as we discussed,will not make us happier,01:00:15,060 --> 01:00:20,730无论我们是否能实现这目标whether attaining of the goal or failing to attain the goal.我们会经历人生起伏We'll be on the ups and downs,the vicissitudes.但如果我们想要基础水平 此刻就是了But if we want the base level- the base level is the here and now当下 就是这过程The present.It's the process.是我们正经历着的旅程 而不是结果It's the journey that we're living mostly,not the outcome.在书中一开始的地方When I start the book,我谈及 冠军赛会让我开心I talk about thinking this rally championship would make me
happy的确让我开心了四小时 但之后我又回到基础水平And it did.For 4 hours.And then back again to base level.获得终身职位的教授以为Professors who get tenures think that is这事会让他们余生都快乐what would make them happy for the rest of their lives-那个目标的实现the attainment of that goal.其实不然It doesn't.他们回到了幸福的基础水平They go back to base level of happiness,无论他们是否实现了这个目标whether they get it,or don't get it.关键是学习 享受这个过程The key is to learn,to enjoy the process.目标的其中一个作用是解放我们And one of the roles of the goals is to liberate us那样我们就能享受这个过程so that we can enjoy the process.目标是获得结果的手段Goals are means toward the present end,这与许多目标理论背道而驰which is taking a lot of goal theory and turning it around.这解释了为什么如此多的成功者不快乐This explains why so many high achievers are unhappy.这也解释了为什么如此多的成功者This explains why so many high achievers沉沦于药品及酒精turn to drugs and to alcohol.如今这样的人比以前更多By the way,today even more so than in the past-也许是如今我们了解得更多maybe today we know about it more than in the past.他们常进心理治疗中心Going into rehab centers constantly.那样进进出出Coming out and going back.我们问"为什么会这样?"And we ask ourselves,"why? How could it be?"表面上看那些人似乎